Please note that this is an Archived article and may contain content that is out of date. The use of she/her/hers pronouns in some articles is not intended to be exclusionary. Eating disorders can affect people of all genders, ages, races, religions, ethnicities, sexual orientations, body shapes, and weights.

By Quinn Nystrom, MS

This fall feels like a big season of change in our family. My almost 2-year-old is starting nursery school (cue the tears!), and my two stepdaughters are entering 4th grade and 11th grade. That means three kids in three different stages of life, three different sets of schedules, and more drop-offs, practices, and school events than I can keep track of.

On top of that, I’m in recovery from bulimia and alcoholism. And honestly? Back-to-school season can be a lot. It’s a mix of excitement, pride, exhaustion, and stress. Some days I feel like I’m holding it all together, and other days I’m just doing my best to make sure everyone has clean clothes and something to eat.

One thing recovery has taught me, though, is that I can’t put myself last anymore. When I let my recovery slide, everything else eventually falls apart. So I’m learning to take care of myself while taking care of my kids—and to give myself grace when it doesn’t look perfect.

Here are a few things that are helping me right now:

Putting Recovery on the Calendar

Just like soccer practices and back-to-school nights go on the family calendar, I’ve started putting my recovery practices there too. Therapy appointments, support meetings, meals, and snacks—these are non-negotiables. When I treat them like part of the schedule, it reminds me (and my family) that they matter.

Asking for Help Without Guilt

I used to feel like I had to handle everything on my own. But with three kids, that’s not possible. Sometimes I need my partner to cover a pickup, sometimes I need another parent to swap carpool duties (just sent a text asking a Mom for an assist with a ride home from cheer camp for our middle), and sometimes I just need a friend to listen. Recovery has taught me that asking for help doesn’t mean I’m failing—it means I’m taking care of myself so I can show up for the people I love.

Watching for Triggers

The rush of busy days, the temptation to skip meals, the emotions of seeing my toddler head off to school—these can all bring up old feelings and behaviors for me. Now, I try to catch myself before I spiral. Sometimes that means taking a deep breath in the car, texting someone who understands, or simply reminding myself, “I’ve come too far to go back.” and to “play the tape forward”.

Letting Go of Perfection

I want to be the mom who sends Pinterest-worthy lunches, always remembers the permission slip, and cheers the loudest at every game. But the truth is, I can’t do it all—and my kids don’t need me to. They need me present and steady, not perfect. Learning to let go of that pressure is a daily practice, but it’s also such a relief.

Finding Small Moments of Connection

Some of my favorite parts of the day are the little things: singing silly songs in the car, reading a quick story at bedtime, or sharing a snack at the kitchen counter after school. Those moments remind me that being genuinely present is what matters most. And being in recovery allows me to show up for them in ways I couldn’t before.

A Reminder to Myself (and Maybe to You, Too)

This season is busy and messy and sometimes overwhelming, but it’s also full of growth—for my kids, and for me. Recovery doesn’t mean life suddenly gets easy, but it does mean I get to live it fully.

If you’re also navigating parenting while in recovery, I want to say: you’re not alone. It’s hard, but it’s worth it. Taking care of ourselves is one of the best gifts we can give our kids.

Here’s to a school year filled with patience, grace, and small moments of joy.